’Twas two nights before Christmas, no warning, no flashes
When a press release burst into life from the ashes.
“It must go out now!” cried a voice full of fear,
“For once it’s been sent, well, it’s not sitting here!”
The keyboard went clatter! The mulled wine went cold!
As “news” was stretched thinner and panic took hold.
Some stats were dug up, some quotes were proclaimed,
From a boss saying things that were vague and ill aimed.
The headline went BIG and it SHOUTED with bait:
“TIME-SENSITIVE!” “URGENT!” “This just cannot wait!”
Though everyone knew (if they dared to be kind),
It was “urgent” because it was late in the mind.
With a click and a send came a satisfied sigh,
“It’s off the desk now!” went the end-of-year cry.
What happened next? Well, that wasn’t the deal.
It’s out there and that’s all you need to feel real.
But reporters, dear friends, were not waiting in line.
They were clinging to sanity, caffeine, and wine.
Their brains were on turkeys and trains that won’t run,
And how many days till this year’s finally done.
The business desk slumped with a long weary stare.
Another “must run” floating up through the air.
It wasn’t bad news – let’s be perfectly fair –
It just wasn’t news anyone needed right there.
So it sank in the inbox, unread and unseen,
Between “Year-End Round-Ups” and Staff Party memes
No pickup. No glory. No media clout
Just a note to self scribbled: “Plan this earlier… ouch.”
So close down the laptop, step out of the fray,
This story can wait for a much calmer day.
The press will survive, without one more bite.
Merry Christmas to all and to all a good night.